Ahead of tomorrow’s controversial independence referendum in Catalonia, the Daily Slabber has taken to the streets of Northern Ireland to ask local people for their views on a vote that, for obvious reasons, many political heads here may be watching carefully.
First of all the Slabber visited Tyrone and spoke to Muck McChuckinton, a 20 year old republican student and ladder holder for Sinn Fein.
The Daily Slabber: Are you for or against the independence of Catalonia, Muck?
Muck: I am definitely for the freedom of Catalonia so I am hey. For far too long the people of Catalonia have been ruled over by a repressive, outside government that doesn’t have the right to tell Catalans what to do.
The Daily Slabber: But wouldn’t independence mean the partition of Spain? Are republicans for partitioning countries now?
Muck: Up the Ra! Tiocfaidh ar la! Get out of here before I get my muckers together to give you a booting.
We also visited the Shankill Road and spoke to 56 year old loyalist community representative Neal Capper.
The Daily Slabber: Are you for or against the independence of Catalonia, Neal?
Neal: I’m dead against it so I am, them Catalan rebels need to be dealt with the way Franco would have dealt with them.
The Daily Slabber: So are you as a loyalist now against the partitioning of countries and the rights of a culturally different people to be independent of the larger population mass in a geographical area?
Neal: No surrender! Remember 1690! Get you the fuck out of here before I have your car burned.
When contacted for a statement a Catalan government spokesman said, “No one gives a fuck what people in Northern Ireland think. Go away now.”