The world of cartoons announced today that it has released He-Man, the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles and Inspector Gadget into the real world in order to capture Donald Trump and bring him back into the realm of cartoons, from which he escaped in 2016 to enter the realm of reality and get elected the American President.
SpongeBob SquarePants, speaking as official spokessponge for the cartoon world, said that Mr Trump had jumped into a swirling black and purple portal opened by the sorcerer Gargamel and had landed in the world of real people and quickly made his way to the top of it by playing on the hunger of people for outlandish entertainment. While this may seem exciting at the time to some people, explained Mr. SquarePants, the consequences in the real world could prove less than funny eventually.
For instance, went on the talking sponge, in the world Mr. Trump comes from violent acts upon beings in it have no real consequences apart from making them see stars or having them break into tiny pieces only to be made whole again in the next frame. If an anvil was dropped on Mr. Trump’s head from a height, even in the real world, all that would happen to him would be that a large lump would pop out of the top of his head around which little blue and yellow birds would fly, but two seconds later he would be sitting at his desk tweeting again as if nothing had happened. Donald Trump, according to Mr. SquarePants, can’t truly conceive of what violent acts in the real world mean and that is why the good guys in the cartoon world have decided to capture him and bring him home again as they fear he is getting close to pressing the red nuclear button on his desk “just to see what happens.”
“Home here in the cartoon dimension thinking up schemes involving the use of giant hypnotising ray guns fired from the moon so he can control this world is where Donald Trump needs to be, not actually in the real world controlling it,” finished Mr. SquarePants.